the kurma
okay that was lame
soz bro

I’ve been watching ‘First Dates’ on youtube and it has been quite entertaining, kinda like watching ‘The Bachelor/Bachelorette’
(yo no judging)
purely for entertainment, obviously completely unrealistic
I don’t believe in having feelings for so many different people at the same time, that’s definitely not love
there are soo many dating apps out there, anywhere from the casual hook-ups all the way to the serious of the bunch, eHarmony
I always wonder – how many of the profiles are real/genuine
no shade but we humans always would like to put the best version of ourselves out there, which is of course completely fine
you should always put your best foot forward
akan tetapi, I feel like a lot of people photoshop their profiles to the point where it just sounds unreal, deceiving rather,
photoshopping your photo is one thing, when two people actually meetup, there is no way of hiding how you really look like, how tall you are etc etc
(makeup is a magic trick though, gotta admit that ha – but not permanent)

but personality? the actual personality?
there is so much shiz you can hide, consciously or subconsciously
without anyone knowing for a dang long time
that’s why some of my guy friends would say things like, “it takes at least three years to know someone properly”

but they are quite right
it’s because people photoshop their personality (personalityshop?)
it’s kinda sad isn’t it
a dating profile is kinda like an item on a menu
you picked it because it sounds like it would be totally yum
and you have that expectation how it would be
and when it actually arrives
“this is so not what I ordered”
reality trumps expectations like a mofo

why though? why the personalityshop? why fake it?
I guess it’s a way to feel guarded? to not feel vulnerable?
because of being jaded and/or burned?
or just to play that game
that dang game (EYEROLL)

so catlady it is 😹


No not that Kesha song, though I have to admit that song is catchy as

I got massively overwhelmed a few days ago –
and I hate being caught in that state in public – just seemed so vulnerable and the fact that people often assume that it is just the degree, well fck not, it’s an iceberg situation – I wish it was just that, then it is just normal basal stress, but the actual fact of the matter is that I have so much at stake here, with so many uncertainties 😶

and might I add, so little time 😱